disabled
Feeling the need to be independent from everyone else right now, I drove myself to my doctor's appointment 30 minutes away in San Jose. The drive was extremely difficult, I almost got into an accident several times as I had episodes of the movements while the rain came down in heavy waves. Even grasping the steering wheel with 2 hands, I could barely keep my own body in control let alone the vehicle.
I've been so caught up in proving to myself that I can get better, assuming that this thing will act like a cold and slowly improve, denying that the worst parts of the dystonia came and went on it's own regard like a predator. I've been trying to pretend I could someday live the same life that I was accustomed to, that I could somehow bypass my disease and at least pick up a few of the things I've let go.
It was for the first time struggling on the road feeling helpless and afraid of the world when I finally felt like I was truly disabled.
I've been so caught up in proving to myself that I can get better, assuming that this thing will act like a cold and slowly improve, denying that the worst parts of the dystonia came and went on it's own regard like a predator. I've been trying to pretend I could someday live the same life that I was accustomed to, that I could somehow bypass my disease and at least pick up a few of the things I've let go.
It was for the first time struggling on the road feeling helpless and afraid of the world when I finally felt like I was truly disabled.
posted by RJ at 1:18 PM
1 Comments:
Hi there! I began botox treatments for cervical dystonia when I was 26 - almost four years ago. Like your experience, the first few treatments didn't provide all the results I had hoped for. I just wanted to encourage you and let you know that it might take a few tries for the doctor to figure out what configuration of muscles/injection spots will work for you.
Post a Comment
<< Home